drmargaret

The email told me of an airline crash in Africa killing people I was related to. Because of some technicality, there was more than $1 million dollars I could get if only I’d contact them and put up some earnest money of my own to help them help me. I know all of my living relatives and they aren’t in Africa.

The other email was from PayPal asking me for my account number and password because there were some irregularities on my account. I don’t have a PayPal account.

These scams, and others like them, are part of internet fraud. It’s a growth industry. Some, like the first, involve people’s desire to get rich quick. In the old days this was played with a winning lottery ticket by someone who couldn’t cash it. They needed the money fast, were in the country illegally, had a greedy partner, or were a criminal. I liked the criminal one, at least they were truthful. So they offered to let you keep the winning ticket if you gave them some cash up front. You got left with a worthless piece of paper, they made off with your money. The second involves asking for information or “phishing.” It can also be played on the phone or in person. A phoney web site is set up to look like a real web site. It asks for information you are never supposed to give out–like a password. The thief can then use the information to access your account.

The problem is that people start thinking they can’t trust anyone. That no one ever does anything good or kind or helpful. They become paranoid.

Paranoid people act different. They never saw a good intention they weren’t suspicious of. There never was a gift horse they didn’t look in the mouth. They get worried before there is anything to worry about.

Gullible people fail to worry about things. They think there is nothing but goodness in others. They think no one intends to harm them. They place themselves at risk and then are surprised.

My neighbor and I have different world views about the nature of people. She is basically suspicious of others. I have suspicions of some people, but most people do not cause me to be suspicious automatically. She lives in a world populated by evil, frightening people she worries about. She plots ways to ensure they don’t take advantage of her or harm her or those she knows. Although we live in the same neighborhood, I live in a world populated by very different people. Most people are kind and helpful. They will stop and give you directions and will lend you a hand. The actual crime rate is low in a city with a fairly high crime rate. I don’t worry much about the people who live around me. Oh there’s the guy up the street who gives everyone pause, as does the guy down the block, but the police are at their homes every other day checking on them. As long as they keep to themselves, and they do, it’s fine.

I ran into some guys loading up their truck with gardening supplies at the local home improvement place. So I asked them if they could come over and help with some yard work some Saturday. I mentioned that to my neighbor. You would have thought I had just asked to be assasinated. She thought I was crazy. In her world you don’t just ask people. You get references from people who know people, who know people. These were nice, clean cut men, who were doing work for a living. They were doing work on their own home. They might be able to give me an estimate and do some work on my house as well. They weren’t crazy, drunk, hung over, and were up at the crack of dawn on a Saturday. Now if someone has a lawnmower here there might be a deal. If they do a good job I might ask them to come back. Now I do tell people if I’m calling workers to come over to the house. That way someone knows who was over and what was intended. It’s a safe thing. There’s a before and after call. There may be a during call if there’s someone in the house and I’m alone. That increases my safety. Most workers do the same thing. They call at the job site and call when they leave. They may even call when there. It’s the same thing; it’s for their safety. It’s a nice rule to follow and it limits liability in this litigious society.

So there needs to be a balance so someone isn’t too gullible or too paranoid. So the view of most people about others is that they are decent unless they prove otherwise.

There’s something about doing things within moderation that often seems to escape us. Not just me, although certainly me. We bite off more than we can chew.

I decided I was going to do some painting yesturday. No big deal. Just a couple of walls. In fact just one wall and one partial wall. But it’s a big deal for me and I know that. And I decided to top it off with planting two plants. Not good. Very not good. But it seems like such a little amount of stuff, doesn’t it?

I should have had a clue when the guy at Lowe’s said it was quick when I returned to get the second pint of paint. Normally it covers in one coat but it was needing two coats of “Delightful Moon.” I should have had a clue at the store when my arm was going numb, before I ever put the roller into the paint. But I was determined. Determination gets you to push through pain. So I did the first wall, all the way through the second coat, and into the store for the second can, back home and completed the second coat and started the second partial wall first coat before I knew I needed to lie down.

I talked with a guy on Friday. He had neuropathy for 7 or 8 years prior to the development of diabetes. He had 7 or 8 years to get his diet under control while he just had the pins and needles feeling in his feet. But he didn’t do that. He didn’t do that and the pins and needles of neuropathy migrated to his hands. He didn’t do that despite the familt history of diabetes. He didn’t do that because although he knew his diet was insane regarding sugar and carbohydrates, his blood sugar readings weren’t completely stupid so he continued. Now he takes insulin. I understand that.

There are a bunch of MDs who would scream at me about yesturday if they knew. Something on the order of “You did WHAT? On a ladder? Painting? Whatever for?” For the sense of being normal. In the past the diabetic guy could eat sugar. In the past I could paint four walls without pain, maybe even six. In the past we were healthy people.

There are lots of people like that. The people who can’t drink, who can’t gample, who can’t walk far, who can’t breathe well. The people who are at the wake up points of their illnesses. The you better take care of this or else points. The moderation points. The points where you have to cut back seriously or face the dire consequences and some of them may be fatal points.

Psychologists call what I did yesturday denial. It’s a fancy word meaning you hold your middle finger up to whatever is wrong with you and make the challenge. Sooner or later it holds up it’s own middle finger and challenges back victorious. Neener neener. It’s part of figuring it out. People toy with illnesses that can be life threatening. They come in to their SSDI evaluations not taking their medications for several days to make their conditions seem much worse and to let themselves think that maybe they don’t really need to take them. It’s a dance. I don’t dance with my medications. I dance with my activity level.

I was told to be sedentary. Not much more than stretching. A little bit of exercise is good, more than that and there would be hell to pay. I was told that in the 1990’s. That was long before there was quite so much wrong. Occasionally I would try more than stretching. Not good. I could do some stuff but not a lot. Yesturday was a lot. Not good. So I get to spend most of the day in pain and resting. The pain is my own fault. You live you learn and you hopefully do less next time.