Training children and dogs
There’s a basic sequence and order of training behaviors. Children get to learn these things by the time they are four years old. Dogs learn these same things by the time they are two years old. It is necessary to train these in order. Some children, and some dogs, pick up the behaviors on their own with no training. Here is the order:
1. Look at me
2. Sit
3. Leave it
4. Sit and stay there
5. Stay in a place
6. Come here
7. Stay with me (heel)
8. Go get something and bring it back (fetch)
9. Down
10. Be quiet
Some people teach Down after Sit. Some people teach Fetch sooner because they want something to do with the dog. Some people never teach be quiet as a command at all, just ask my neighbor’s dogs, Shut up Molly and Shut up Libby.
Now some people get resentful when I explain that the above things are basic commands taught to dogs that used to be taught in the exact same manner to children. They were taught in preschool. People don’t do this anymore for the most part. On television, several nights a week, people can tune into one of several Nanny programs and watch behavior specialists show parents how to do these commands with older children. A few shows have Barbara Woodhouse or Uncle Matty showing how to do these basic commands with dogs. They are the same commands. I had a discussion with Uncle Matty who says it’s different training children than training dogs, and I think he may be correct, dogs may be easier. In both cases you have to train the owner or the parents.
Behavior work involves identifying behavior. Behavior is what you can observe. People make things up about motives and feelings. Behavior is what you can see. Behavior is about what happens.
Everyday I have at least one parent who tells me their child can’t sit still. Most people confuse sitting with sitting and staying in one place. They confuse number 2 with number 4 in the above list. So the first thing I do is to see if they are correct. I ask the child to sit. Almost all the time the child is able to sit. They can’t stay in a sit. So I observe for the parent that their child can indeed sit. They can’t stay seated. For the few children that indeed can’t sit, I train the child to sit. It takes a few seconds. I then have the parent do the command. I tell the parent they will have to practice the command several times a day. The children who make no eye contact have more of a problem and need to work on that first, prior to working on a sit.
The basic things that get taught by behavior specialists, whether at Petco or PetSmart or some private behavior specialist for a dog, or through school, the Regional Center, some Nanny, or a private behavior specialist for a child are technique and timing of interventions. Now I have two dogs and my timing is horrible. My two dogs can both reasonably get through all 10 of the above list. Baxter does them easily. Cinnamon does them when she is good and ready. Some will say Cinnamon isn’t well trained, but she does all the list and there are no problems. I think if some 4 year old child can get through the list with no problems then things are fairly fine. Timing doesn’t have to be perfect, dogs and kids will adapt to less than perfect. The better you are in training, the easier it will be for the dog or the kid to figure out what you want. It’s important to be consistent. It’s important to have a schedule. It’s important to have the same trainer. It’s important to use the same commands. Those all help. It’s important to set up the environmnet to make it as distraction free as possible for training to take place. All those things are important. But children and dogs adapt to less than optimal conditions. If there’s some problems, work on getting more optimal. In behavior work the problems belong to the trainer to work around. If you are having problems with you child or your dog get a professional behavior specialist to help as soon as the problems start. If a dog isn’t looking at you as a puppy it’s a big problem. If a child isn’t making eye contact at 6 months it’s a big problem. Get an evaluation. Big problems get bigger. If your two year old dog isn’t housebroken or your four year old isn’t potty trained and isn’t using utensils get an evaluation. If your dog is growling and biting or your child is, it’s a big problem. It’s not going to go away, it will get worse with time. Training can fix it and make things more livable at your house.
